Friday, June 17, 2016

What if I fall? Oh my darling, what if you fly?

Hi guys (including girls) !! It's been a while.  How's everyone doing?  Thanks to all who have read my previous posts.  It means soo much to me. Today I came across a quote about the title above and it got me thinking.  There are so many things I have wanted to do in my life,  so many people I wanted to introduce myself too and talk too,  so many requests I wanted to make but I thought about it. What if they say no? What if I mess up?  What if people don't like it?  What if I am rejected?  What if I fail? And just like the title what if I fall?  Too many times, our thoughts are just on the worst case scenario and we never do anything because we are always thinking of the negative.  We keep over thinking and try to be cautious meanwhile it's the risk takers who make news, who dream and then realise their dreams.  Think this way, what if I succeed? What if I fly?  What's the best case scenario?

And more importantly, that something didn't work out for me the first time doesn't mean I have failed.

F - first
A - attempt 
I -  in
L - learning

Instead of thinking you have lost or you have failed,  you have discovered one wrong of way of doing something and the next time you try, you will do it the other way.  If you are trying to approach someone and they say no to you,  so what?   It doesn't take anything off you if you're are really confident in yourself and you know your worth. He or she could say no,  yeah but what if they say yes?

  For me, knowing that I tried and it didn't work is much better than living in the uncertainty of what could have been if I had actually done something. 

 One of my favorite quotes of 2016 is "Sometimes we need to just do first and think later" 😁. J.  K.  Rowling did say "it is impossible to live without failing at something unless you live so cautiously that you might as well not have lived at all - in which case,  you fail by default" Don't live life so cautiously, do that thing, take that step and see what happens.  It could be the best decision you ever made. Until the next post,  #chinupandbefabulous #dofirstthinklater

P. S.  Incase you're wondering who J.  K.  Rowling is. She is just a badass author who happened to write the entire Harry Potter series and other books.

Saturday, June 04, 2016


Hi!!! Have you seen Joy the movie? If you have not and you fit into the description above, you have to. How did I find this movie because I had never heard of it before. Well, my usual movie streaming site - .It was just a lazy Saturday morning and I was searching for something to feed my eyes on when I stumbled on the thumbnail and I was like JOY?? What kind of title is that?? This must be a musical, after reading the summary, I decide to give it a try. I wonder if I am the only one who can over analyse things even movies, always trying to find meanings to things and pick out lessons from every event, that's me! So straight to the movie, the lead character was played by Jennifer Lawrence - one of the young badass actresses of our time whom I love, she is really good and the film is based on a real life story. It is all about a divorced mother of 2 who invented a self-wringing mop and made a business out of it but not without her own struggles. It spoke to me from the beginning to the end. So straight to the lessons

  1. YOU WILL BE TURNED DOWN MANY TIMES: All through history, people who have made it and turned out great faced several rejections, people did not believe in their dreams, their talents, their ideas, their abilities. Read the biographies of men and women who are celebrated today Oprah, Beyonce(whom I love), J.k. Rowling, Elvis Presley, Thomas Edison and the list goes on. Joy was rejected too, no one was interested in a special mop at a surprisingly higher price when the ones they had were doing just fine. So brace yourself for rejection because it is inevitable to attain true success and become who you want to be. You will be rejected, fired, criticised, spat on and looked down on but never give in and never give up.                                                                         
  2. YOU DON'T HAVE TO TAKE SHIT FROM ANYONE & A CLOSED MOUTH IS A CLOSED DESTINY: From the experiences I have had so far, I know that people are going to talk shit about you, say shit to you, try to make you feel less than you are. You might find yourself in bad situations and if you are like me, you try to keep cool and tolerate everything, but truth is you are a human being who has a voice and opinion. Say how you feel about stuff, voice out what you want and whatever you are not comfortable with, confront who you have to. You will have to step on some toes, you can't please everybody and displease yourself. You deserve to be happy too. You should be in control of what goes on in your business. Don't be afraid to make your points clear and put people in their place. If you keep your mouth shut, you just keep dying inside.
  3. NETWORK! NETWORK!! NETWORK!!!  You might be talented and have an amazing idea but honey you can never do it all on your own, you need help and it is okay to need help. My mum always tells us "no man is an island". Don't be afraid to go out there and meet people and share what you do with them, they just might know someone who knows someone who knows someone that can help you immensely, Remember that every conversation is an opportunity.
  4. SHE GAVE UP EVERYTHING FOR HER DREAM: The kind of commitment she had to see her vision till the end was scary, I personally have an issue with going through with things that seem to not be going as I planned or expected. She gave up her house, everything she had to invest in her dream which is something we should all emulate. Remember no one will believe in your dream except you do!
  5. ALWAYS BE YOURSELF : Who you are is your brand and we are created to be unique. In every situation, please be yourself. Joy was about to go on live TV to promote her invention. The TV corporation had already styled and dolled her up but she asked to change one thing and she went back to her original look. It spoke to me because there have been times where I felt I had to leave some of my "danie-ness" behind to fit into a crowd or some people's expectations. Always be yourself. Be unique. Do you boo! 
  6. BE CAREFUL ABOUT WHAT YOU PUT YOUR SIGNATURE ON: My mum always tells us this. She will be like "have you read it? Make sure to read that paper before you sign o!" Know the conditions of a contract or agreement before you sign so you don't find your self in a tight corner.
  7. NEW KIND OF CONFIDENCE: there are days when you don't feel so great about yourself! You feel this life isn't just cut out for you. I have come to discover that changing our look a bit can give a new kind of confidence. For Joy, it was a new hairstyle, new look and some red lipstick. Red lipstick can be so empowering. if you are going through some emotional blues maybe a bad breakup or heartbreak, you should consider changing your look a bit and see how you feel. 
  8. Joy's ex husband was a major help and support system for her during the beginning and following stages of her business. They made a good team. It got me thinking and my friend Peju and I always discuss this. People come into our lives for a reason and for a season so we should not get caught up in the fact that we have a connection with someone and suddenly that's our life partner, NO! Her husband was a better business associate than a relationship partner which I believe was why they crossed paths in the first place. Understand the time frames and purposes of people in your life before making decisions about them.
Just a few things I will like to add: 
  • Keep your friends close and your enemies closer. Your enemies might sometimes be household e.g. Joy's sister Peggy.
  • Don't ever listen to or let in any form of negativity.
I was so happy to see her final state. Wealth and success looked good on her and guess what? It looks good on you and I too. Keep dreaming! Keep pushing! Until the next post..... #chinupandbefabolous

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